I hope this blog post finds you well

I went on a short hike the other day. Saw some cool butterflies. Maybe. Or were they moths? I find myself constantly hindered by my ignorance about bugs, birds, and other assorted critters. Am I supposed to be excited about what I see on the trail? Should I feel awe? Or am I just surrounded by stupid bugs?

Birds were everywhere. Are they any good? Should I be bringing binoculars for bird watching? Was the owl I heard one of the big badass owls or one of the little goofy ones?

Then there were the bugs. A cricket? Grasshopper? No idea. A giant bee-looking thing buzzed by my head— a honey bee? Bumblebee? Or is it a Humblebee? Is “humblebee” even a real word? It sounds like something my grandfather would make up. Should I even care what it was, or should I just be glad it didn’t sting me?

Here’s the thing: I want to care. I want to know if I should I be catching butterflies like my boy Vlad. Or am I just sweating through my shirt for the same basic bugs I’d find in my backyard?

I‘m a terrible photographer with shaky hands who only uses a 24mm lens on a camera that I think is broken. (Pictures from the hike were beyond my normal standard of unfocused.) I can never get the Merlin app out in time to catch a clear bird call. Technology cannot help me. I need a travel buddy who can point at a critter and say, “That’s a cool bug” or “You don‘t need to care about that bug.” And that’s all they would ever say. Otherwise they would blend into the wilderness until called upon again.

For now, I’m just a sweaty goon in the woods, equal parts curious and clueless. I just want to understand. Or get eaten by a gator. One or the other.